A little light relief . . .May 14th, 2008 | By Ian Poulton | Category: Personal Columns
The good lady of the house has been at Galway for General Synod this week, leaving me to cope with things like imagining tasks for the cleaner and knowing where the alarm system manual might be for when the engineer called.
A Belgian friend sent me the following, perhaps a suggestion that I might not cope as well as I should!
AVAILABLE NOW – EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN
ALL ARE WELCOME
OPEN TO MEN ONLY
Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants.
The course covers two days, and topics covered on this course include:
TOILET ROLLS – DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR
Practising with hamper (pictures and graphics)
DISHES & CUTLERY; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?
Debate amongst a panel of experts
Losing the remote control – Helpline and support groups
LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS
Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down whilst shouting – Open forum
EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?
Group discussion and role play
HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH
REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
Real life testimonial from the one man who did
IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
LIVING WITH ADULTS; BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER
Online class and role playing
HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques
REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU’RE GOING TO BE LATE
Bring your calendar or PDA to class
GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME
Individual counsellors available
Of course, in this age of equality, no-one would object if a similar list was drawn up for women, would they? 🙂