“I think I should hold onto these for safekeeping. I’ll put them in the top of the cupboard so that you know where they are.”
My sister confiscated my hair clippers in gentle but firm words.
The clippers cost me £17.99 in Boot’s about a month into the lockdown when my hair had become intolerable (it grows outward rather than downward when it becomes unkempt).
Two bad haircuts had been achieved and the barber shops had reopened. However, there seemed to be queues at all of them on Saturday.
Getting up yesterday morning, I looked in the mirror. A tidy up seemed to be in order. A Number 3 comb seemed to achieve a reasonable result. One side was slightly longer than the other, but if I tipped my head the imbalance seemed less pronounced.
Putting the clippers away. I ran my hand up the back of my head. There seemed to be a few loose strands. I plugged the clippers in again and ran them up the back of my head. Chunks of grey hair fell to the floor. There must have been much more to cut than I had thought. Then I realised that I had fitted no comb to the clippers and there were two, if not three, bald patches.
Looking like someone who had gone through some medical procedure (or someone who had attempted a Number One haircut), I wondered how long it took for hair to regrow.
My sister was persuaded that some sort of remedial work was necessary. All that was feasible was an attempt to even up the lengths. “Don’t worry, it will look all right in a month. Please don’t attempt to cut your own hair again!”
With Number One length back and sides and very short hair on top, I was glad it was July and not January. An old fisherman’s hat was suggested as protection against the son.
Next time I want to try explain the economics of Adam Smith to someone, I shall remember the haircut. Smith stressed the effectiveness of the division of labour explaining how it not only increases output, but how the specialisation by each worker meant that the product was much better than if a single person attempted every task.
The person who is subjected to my explanation of Smith’s theory might well conclude that it would better be explained by a specialist teacher and that I might better spend my time cutting hair.